Journey into deep winter…

February 21, 2011

A journey can become a sacred thing:
Make sure, before you go
To take the time
To bless your going forth
To free your heart of ballast
So that the compass of your soul
Might direct you toward
The territories of spirit
Where you will discover
More of your hidden life
And the urgencies
That deserve to claim you …
John O’Donohue

I love John O’Donohue….what a way with words.

I must admit, the winter inner “ballast” feels very heavy indeed after slogging around in the pouring rain this past week trying to “stage” a client’s garden.  (I think it was fine the way it was.)  There is this sense of a heavy cold body, and then there is the actual heaviness of cold wet dirt turning to mud that must be moved across white carpet without leaving a trace.  (I wish I were kidding.)  And the spirit begins to follow suit…sodden!

Where is the compass of my discouraged soul pointing after such work?  Toward my bathtub!!  I could soak for hours to try to recover the warm that was lost and it still wouldn’t feel like enough.  I realize this is a personal problem.  Anyway…

A useful realization occurs to me while I am soaking:  Now is the time for careful resolve~for determination, and grit, and visioning the sunshine again.  All of you who live in “grey-sky-snowed-in-land” you know what I mean.  I used to live there too.  We must go on! We must imagine the equinox on March 20th.  We must treasure how dry we are inside our rainsuits and snowpants.  We must feel grateful when circulation moves back into our numbed hands and feet.  (Ah, feel the literal burn!)  It reminds me of the energy moving back up the tree, promoting bud break and leaf growth.  That too is coming.  For some of us it’s already here.  We must look up, no matter how heavy the winter heart ballast.  As John says, perhaps its weight has measure we should attend to before Spring.